Absent-minded Professional Pillows

'I forgot my keys!'

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

"How come I can't remember what I forget, but I always remember that I forgot something!"

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

'The hardest thing is convincing the wife that when I'm staring out of the window I'm actually composing a tweet.'

"Hello?"

'Don't worry about this meeting. I got everything we need right up here.'

"I read an unforgettable book! Unfortunately, I don't remember the title and the author..."

'My mind was a million miles away today, but that wasn't far enough.'

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.

"They need to come up with an app that will locate your glasses."

'Which arrow points to my office?'

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

"Oh, that reminds me of this article I barely remember."

As the years passed, Grandpa became more absent minded...

"I'm sorry I didn't find your wallet but I found six pairs of reading glasses!"

"Are you going to move?"

"Phone, wallet, glasses... What am I forgetting?"

"I like that you all brought enthusiasm, but did anyone bring food?"

The brain cell that was suppose to help me remember.

"I'm a speaker and I'm lost. Which one of these rooms has the conference/seminar/convention/wedding that I don't remember the name of?"

Mary had forgotten about her recent online shopping purchase!

"You know that feeling when you walk into a room and can't remember why you're there..."

"I've lost my keys, my wallet and my iPhone! Frankly, I think MINE is the lost generation!"

"I keep forgetting it's not Christmas,"

"Sometimes I forget my shopping list. So this time, I made sure to put it in my new purse!"

"Tonight? I thought it was tomorrow night."

"Honey, did you see where I placed that book entitled:'How to improve your memory?"

"Only once! That particular winter morning, it has snowed overnight and the sunrise was so spectacular I was speechless: I forgot to cock-a-doodle-do!"