Abacus Aficionado Gifts

The computer is down.

"I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave sir. The management suspects you of counting cards."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

So you're a mocking bird...

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

"Yes, go and play, but be careful, there are a few thermals around: make sure you're not lifted too high..."

'This is the last time I take you frog hunting!'

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

'He likes a room where he can reverberate.'

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

"Oh, Oh, Oooohh!"

'Nice, but it needs more angst.'

"Oh...Hi Bob, listen buddy, I'm in a meeting right now, I'll Caw you back."

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

"Outré or simply bad?"

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."