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Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

"Is this seat taken?"

Kangaroo looks at man with child carrier and thinks 'Amateur'.

The Litany Of Fun

'More bad news from the lab. You're allergic to peanuts.'

Kittens and snake.

"So near and yet so far!"

"He didn't do anything, Gregory. This is a zoo"

"Apparently, they learn a great deal by watching us."

'And that's why we make 'em sign permission slips.'

A mother and baby elephant

Mother and baby meets kangaroo and baby.

'That's a cougar, come along, we're here to see the monkeys.'

A giraffe in a truck is heading for a low bridge.

'At last! Thanks so much for curing my constipation doc! Doc?'

"I didn't go to the office today. I went to the zoo."

"Hey, three squares a day, no trophy hunters. Maybe captivity isn't so bad."

"Oh goodie, a school excursion! Let's spit on the teacher to make their trip memorable..."

"Offering is up since we started contracting with the zoo for ushers."

Yes, I had great fun at the zoo yesterday. Daddy had fun too, especially when one of the animals came in at thirty to one."

'Honey, I would love to go out with you, but I feel like an idiot at all your friends' parties. The conversations are always way above my head.'

Chester vs Krimpknuckle - The Undisputed King of Stepladder Salesmen.

Welcome to the Zoo.

"How was your class field trip to the zoo?"

Vet holding an umbrella under a giarffe to avoid getting urinated on

"He'd been drunk,he'd been walking past the zoo...there had been something else, but damn he couldn't remember."

Feeding The Lions At The Zoo

'Look at that plumage. He must be the alpha male.'

Two old apes watch two young apes swinging in the trees - 'Brachiating?! Kids these days... whatever happened to good old fashioned swinging?!'

Holding up a child so he can feed a giraffe.

Animals smoking at the zoo back entrance

Family looking at family of apes.

"Harry, we need you to throw out the car keys."

'What colour is it?'

'Would you prefer a tiger to eat you, or a gorilla.'