Zoo Lover T-Shirts

"I feel tremendous pressure to frolic."

'I find my weight is fine for my height.' (Hippo on stilts).

"Ever heard of the Alexander technique

Anteater at zoo points to sign on enclosure and says to family: 'It's not as if that's all I do. I write poetry, I'm very much involved in charity work ... why single out that one thing?'

"Feels like an elephant trunk...."

"This snake measures 24 inches."

"The therapeutic petting zoo creatures have calmed the office, but the cleaning crew is freaking out!"

Prisoner hiding from guards disguised among the zebras.

'Relax - they'll never get beyond the first underpass.'

That's not a sheep … hey, maybe I'm not a sheep.

"Well, there's nothing in the rules that says baboons can't perform surgery, so what the hey, let's give him a shot."

You've been promoted to elephant world.

London Zoo - The Monkey House

Visit to the antediluvian reptiles at sydenham - Master Tom strongly objects to having his mind improved.

'This cell phone craze is getting out of hand!' (zoo visitors seeing a gorilla with a phone).

'I don't think I've seen your brother, what does he look like?'

'But dear, you always said you didn't care where we went on our honeymoon.'

"Promise I won't evolve into one of those, Ma."

The undisputed king of stepladder salesman.

"What burns my bottom about www.dazoosucks.com is that we capitalized them."

"All right... who's been feeding the elephant viagra?"

"Maybe there's something to this Darwin stuff."

"Ya lived up to your name. . ."

"You look like you've seen a ghost!"

"Says here that a bird eating wild cat has escaped from the city zoo and was last seen near the . . . Friggin' nice shot Earl!"

Animals

Elephant in photobooth

'Tell me Mr Fish has growing up in this environment affected you in anyway?'

'I come here whenever I begin to fret about stretchmarks.'

"Tag. . . you're it!"

Mother and Baby Hippopotamus.

Noah's Ark Zoo

I got the idea from a visit to the zoo!

Children's expectations.

'What do you mean... your brother gave you a black eye?'