Zen Innovator Pillows

'He meditates,on the harmony of nature and the meaning of life for a few weeks, and then - Zap! - A new silicon chip.'

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"Showoff"

Sea weed harvest.

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

Enlightened Cursing

"I'm a pragmatist, Leon. Before I put a new product on the market, I ask myself, 'Will it sell?' "

"And what my plan may lack in coherence, it makes up for in the exhilerating momentum created by all of these super-cool arrows!"

Working from OM.

Binary Meditation.

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

I'm more than just a sauce, I'm a re-sauce.

"Mom?"

'At least with math and physics you sometimes find the answer.'

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

Zen Litter Box

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"

"When I was making money, I made the most money, and now that I'm spiritual I'm the most spiritual."

'At least with math and physics you sometimes find the answer.'