Youthfulness Embracer Pillows

'My car didn't start this morning.'

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

'There's so much I want to do with my life...before I reach the age of criminal responsibility, that is.'

"Botox."

Congratulations!

"So you dreamed you were an adult?"

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

You Know You're Old When...

You're only young once but apparently there's no limit on childish. (Published originally on January 15, 2008.)

"You got better-looking as you got older—up to a point."

"Frankly, it would be hard to beat being a bird flying around on such a glorious sunny day!"

'I know you're going to inherit the throne from your father, but I want you to go to medical school just in case.'

'Oh, Harold...How can I face our family and friends knowing you're a crossdresser?!'

'He keeps us young!'

"I've lost my youth."

Life is more than I can bear phobia.

Change is good.

'...something that will make my wife look slim and twenty years younger...'

"I can't make you look younger, but I can make you look like you've had a lot of expensive plastic surgery."

"That reminds me, Hon. Your Botox shipment arrived yesterday."

We are 50 going on 15...

'I need a botox job.'

'She says she's 40 but she's forgotten to add on the V.A.T.!'

No caption. (A young man walks his dog as an old man walks a pet snail.

'All of a sudden all they care about is boys...and make-up.'

Although gravity had taken its toll Connie, she had devised a way to look youthful...

"We live here. We just dress this way to fit in."

"You can grow old gracefully. I'm fighting it every inch of the way!"

'How do you do it? You don't look a day over 3G!'

Aging.

"My kids keep me young."

"Nope, you owe the government absolutely nothing. It's true what they say...these are the most wonderful times of your life."

'Peace'