Youthfulness Admirer Pillows

'How do you do it? You don't look a day over 3G!'

'...something that will make my wife look slim and twenty years younger...'

The Age of Reptiles. . .

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

'There's so much I want to do with my life...before I reach the age of criminal responsibility, that is.'

"Botox."

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

"'A', I'm adorable."

You're only young once but apparently there's no limit on childish. (Published originally on January 15, 2008.)

'How do you expect me to remember. . . when every year you look younger?'

Abdul is a great baby-sitter!

"Are you going to have a baby too, Uncle Fred?"

'I'd invite you in, but I'm way too young to settle for less.'

Future Old People

"This is your great-great-great-great grandfather Felipe. If he was alive, he'd be a very famous man."

"I've lost my youth."

Starfleet Command. Live long and prosper. Vulcans must have great retirement benefits.

"My mom and dad are still very sharp."

"Congratulations, sir, you've outlived the lot of them!"

'The staff seem to get younger and younger.'

"I can't make you look younger, but I can make you look like you've had a lot of expensive plastic surgery."

"That reminds me, Hon. Your Botox shipment arrived yesterday."

"I'm putting all the profits back into research."

"Oh, no! Now you know my secret identity as Toilet Paper Man!"

'I need a botox job.'

Cherub and old angel

Although gravity had taken its toll Connie, she had devised a way to look youthful...

"Nope, you owe the government absolutely nothing. It's true what they say...these are the most wonderful times of your life."

New for 40-somethings who don't want to look like geezers...

"Where did my life go?"

"Mum's really happy with her new botox treatment...I think."

"That growth spurt I was waiting for didn't quite turn out the way I'd hoped."