Yard Designer Gifts

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Gardener

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"He loves his leaf blower."

"I think I picked the wrong spot to plant that apple tree."

Beginning Yarder.

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

'There are some good things about a vegetable garden. Dirt at your fingertips, for instance.'

Weeds

'I don't make house calls. My mom won't let me leave the yard.'

"Ooh, another unsuspecting victim."

Digging.

"You see a bunny rabbit in the clouds. I see mom telling me to mow the lawn."

Burt was a true artist and conservationist. He recycled his beer cans...Making an ornate garden wall and rockery.

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

'He took a fetching class.'

"We're going to need a bigger rake."

'Like I'm going to give this up to migrate.'

Topiary: When the written word isn't enough

"Well, since his retirement from British Aerospace the only thing he's managed to do is build a bird table

'It's that damned gnome that attracts them!'

'Don't wear that shirt in the garden dear. Roses don't fit in with my planting scheme'

Garden sprinkler in the form of a classical statue

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

'You and I are going to have a long talk when I get you home.'