Yard Chore Champion Gifts

"A garden is a thing of beauty and a job for ever."

Autumn Leaves

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

The Last Leaf

Family working together

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"Yes dear, you have worked very hard on the garden. Unfortunately though, you've put the compost on the weeds and the weed killer on my best roses."

'He's not here right now. He's out pumping iron.'

"She leaves wooden-handled knives soaking in the dishwater all night long. Your Honor."

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

'My wife gave me that one for washing the windows.'

"And now your General Knowledge Round...Where does clean laundry come from?"

"Hey, the last thing I want to do is annoy you. That's actually ninth on my to-do list."

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

"I woke up early, took a shower, got dressed for work then remembered I don't work today."

"The last time we ordered take-out I was up all night doing laundry."

"O.K., so I shrank. But you must admit I am brighter."

'Don't think of sweeping as a chore. Consider it practice for the Olympic Curling Team.'

Sue believed that one day she would find her soul mate - and her missing sock.

Dating Agency: "I am looking for a man whose hobbies are, washing up, dusting and ironing."

"Yes, I can multi-task. Why do you ask?"

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

The Gardener's Calendar: February - This is often a wet month so spike your lawns all over to improve drainage.

Wife taking a photo of her husband and their shoveled walk-way

"I'm helping Mom wash the dishes."

"Hey - we could do with another light bulb. . !"

A day of domestics...

'I didn't forget to empty my pockets. That's your tip.'

Why do you always get to ash and I always have to dry?

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

How to communicate with a man.

New broom