Workstation Wizard T-Shirts

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"We only got six days of funding."

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"Lovely dovetail."

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

Optical Illusion Supply Company.

Waiting for retirement.

Targets.

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"Gosh, 'inept' seems so harsh. Personally, I prefer the term 'productivity-challenged!'"

'I can beat my own drum but it'll be counting on your to toot my horn.'

Gerald Ratner's return

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

The Move.

Tech support...can I help you!

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

Start the session by doing something unusual.

The password: "C'mon everybody try to remember!"

Manual Labor.

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

I got the raise

The imagery attacks the compalcency of the casual web surfer and uses a visual cacophony of discordant images to excite and enthusethe casual visitor...

'Your father installed a security system.'