Workshop Gifts

'I have identified 240 stages of organizational change. Before I discuss them, coffee anyone?'

"Meanwhile, obsessing about productivity is way up."

'Come on, come on, let's work together!'

"Now remember, it's not a cocktail party, it's an overlapping dialogue workshop!"

Start the session by doing something unusual.

We achieve more if we pull together!

Time Management Seminar Schedule.

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"We only got six days of funding."

Claus 2.0

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

"Lovely dovetail."

Belief and Trust.

Brainstorm in progress.

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."

Waiting for retirement.

Targets.

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

"This is the communications workshop, right? Let’s get started, I’m prepared!"

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'Before we begin, please turn off all cell phones.'

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

'I'm sorry you had to wait. My Time Management Workshop started late.'

"…And just what do you think you're going to do with your silly death ray once you've finished it?!"

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

STRIP *Community Care * Squeezing it all in before lunch

How to engage an audience