Workplace Intrigue Gifts

"I suppose we could just ask her what she does around here...but I'm rather enjoying the mystery."

'I heard the Board was talking about kicking you, but I don't know if it's upstairs or out.'

"Did you hear that that bastard McMinney has buggered of to work for Bank of America!"

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

"You would be perfect if you weren't you!"

'I'm a fat cat in a dog-eat-dog world.'

"The water does taste a little funny. Maybe they added analgesics, to ease the pain of restructuring."

"If I'd known you were not looking for experience I wouldn't have lied on my CV."

"I missed your last few words. Would you please mumble them again?"

My husband doesn´t understand you.

"I know this is just my humble opinion, but it's backed by the most comprehensive rumor, gossip and speculation this office can provide!"

Office Politics Superstore.

'Never roll your eyes while the boss is talking.'

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

"We're streamlining efficiency by cutting the staff who we employed to improve efficiency."

"So who else is gonna be there?"

'Forget about me - what can you tell me about the new CEO coming on board?'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"The defibrillators are used when someone is either having a heart attack or trying to leave early."

"Encouraging dissent is a good way of finding out who the traitors are."

'How's the meeting going, Ed?'

A big announcement is coming at work.

"Of course, I'm not suggesting that you should also bail."

"I hear he's getting six figures a year."

"It's a plant based solution."

At Gossips Anonymous...

"Call a meeting, Miss Pendleton. I want to hear some Corporate Creole."

"Pretty good day. I wasn't linked to anything incriminating."

"You'll fit right in. You have a great sense of rumor."

'Send it out confidential. I want everyone to read it.'

"Had half of Fox-and-Friends gnawing my ass this morning."

"Did you hear that Henderson ascended to Heaven amid the entire angelic assembly? You can't buy publicity like that."

'He says he can't bear a fool - well his mother did!'

Two workers chatting by vending machine: 'Who are you working on at the moment?'