Workplace Equality Gifts

"That's a very good suggestion, perhaps one of the men would like to make it?"

'A ceiling? All this time I thought it was a floor.'

'Our standards are very high. We even have high double standards.'

'I want to complain about sexual harassment.' - 'You know you're beautiful when you're angry.'

"So we're agreed then - there's no need to make any changes to our equal opportunities employment policies."

"I don't know why we aren't retaining our female staff...I mean we do everything we can to make the little darlings feel they can be as good as the chaps."

'What you have to understand, Ms. Titmus, is your glass ceiling is my glass floor.'

Goldilock tried the third chair and it was juuust right.

'My thanks to Oliver for ensuring we meet this board's quota of women.'

'I didn't get the promotion. The interviews took place in the men's room.'

'Look, I agree that you deserve the same salary as your male counterparts, but I have a responsibility to defend the traditional pay structure.'

Women's day equality.

'We are fully committed to stamping out sexism so we really want you to see yourself as one of the chaps.'

'Interesting. Anyone else like to share a 'glass ceiling horror story'?'

'Remember the old days, when all of this was phallocentric?'

'Tell me do we actually employ anybody who isn't a protected species ?'

'I've never worked for a woman...should I call you Debbie or Ms. Enright?'

"My Dear Lady, what a perfectly charming idea! I wonder which of us gentlemen put it into your attractive little head."

Joan hits the glass ceiling: 'Sorry, but I've decided to go with Wally of Arc...'

'At least! I get to find out what's above the glass ceiling!'

"HR tells us that we're getting a bad press about how many women the firm employs...we need to act now...does anyone need a new secretary?"

Nuns - "I hit the stained glass ceiling."

"So that's agreed then, we don't need to make any changes to our equal opportunities employment practices!"

'Not a problem. On what they pay us, I can't afford lunch.'

"We've had complaints from HR that we only appoint middle aged white men!"

"To retain our staus as an equal opportunities employer...."

One fly to another: 'She hit the glass ceiling.'

"Your policy of equal pay for equal work is commendable, but my work is superior."

"You have a great resume... experience... education... history... but there is one thing we'd like to see that you don't have..." "A birth certificate issued sometime around 1975."

'Until you joined us, Stanley, there were no dumb questions!'

'Would suit a school leaver...I am a school leaver, I left school in 1968!'

'You say you type 80 words a minute ... Actually, that's not at all important...!'

'While you'll be doing the work of three men, Ms. Hopkins, you'll be getting paid the work of one woman.'

'Call me old-fashioned and sexist, but our new boss is a woman. I'm not sure I can work for a woman.' 'Oh sweetie, you've been doing it for years. Here, go wash the windows.'

"Before I know it, this will all be yours."