Workplace Enjoyment Pillows

"Jim opened a bar in his cubicle. Before you shut it down, keep in mind that company morale has never been higher."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'What's wrong now?'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'These are job perks.'

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'So what do you think of my report, sir?'

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"The boss likes people with strong convictions. You're hired."

"Wake up Thomas, it's not 2020. There's no Zoom camera to turn off to hide yourself."

'Yes, can I help you?'

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

Torn-Off Mouse.

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"He was orphaned at an early age and raised by two giant moths."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

'Sorry, I can't give you a raise. However, I can offer you a splendid opportunity to share the profits.'

"I go that extra mile!"

"As you can see, we have a very flexible work-from-home-at-the-office policy."

'Productivity is up. Lay off a couple of more employees.'

Gary misread the new policy on 'Free Thinking' in the work place.

InIn by-products.

'Don't disturb me - I'm in conference!'