Workplace Banter Champion Gifts

"Maybe we overdid the sedation."

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Trays on desk read, 'Here', 'There' and, 'Neither here nor there.'

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

'It's signed by the entire office. You're not too popular areound here, are you?'

'Is that the smell of fear? Or is it just Meatloaf Monday in the cafeteria?'

'If executive bonuses are outlawed, only outlaws will have bonuses.'

"Every day is Monday." "Except Friday."

'Your advert didn't say anything about intelligence... it said you wanted a manager!'

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

"Got your e-mail and the answer is yes, I can pass you the stapler."

'Wilson, I'll need you to make high pitched screeching noises until I get this modem working properly.'

'Have a great day, but not at my expense.'

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

"I hope your day is going bad."

'Seems like everyday is bring your work to work day.'

' And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse...'

'I want you guys to be aware that a dog-eat-dog environment works for me.'

"I have the kids Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. She has them Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Thursday they're free-range.

'If looks could sue, eh, Walt?'

"I'm leaving Friday and we are all going to the club after work. Will you come?"

Full Of Beans

"Here's a juicy bit of gossip for you!"

"I miss the old water cooler."

It was like he could read my mind.

"Before we start. Can I empower you to pour the coffee?"

'I quit drinking coffee with lunch - it was keeping me awake all afternoon.'

I'm not retired yet...I'm just practicing.

Barrier around water cooler

"We are still hoping to add a few more details later."

'After reviewing your job performance...'