Workout Avoider Pillows

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

'You need an exercise program other than bar-hopping.'

"I know I live just around the corner, but it's taken 6 years for me to come here..."

"Everyday I take a lap around the house. . . usually hers."

"How many reps have you managed in the gym today?"

"I'm exhausted! I've just binge-watched the entire series of 'Fresh Air and Exercise.'"

"It's true: no more burpees."

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

Gym. Check in Here. The only time I feel the burn is when I pay the memberbship fee.

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"We need to walk."

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

"I was all set to go to the gym, but you'd be amazed how much, yoga class and pour-a-glass, sound alike."

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

The Candy Shop. Anytime I eat candy it immediately goes to my mid-section. No time to waist!

'You need more excercize. But I'm drinking as fast as I can.'

"My brain said, exercise....my tummy auto-corrected that to, extra-fries!"

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

'Your back went out because your front went out.'

'But, dear, I am walking the dog.'

"The doctor told him to exercise more, so he jogs to the pub."

The doctor told my husband to be active, but the only exercise he gets is running around looking for the TV remote.

What can I get you? Ham sandwich with extra cheese. Double banana split. Side of sugar. Coming up, sir. I am abandoning my New Year's diet! If you're gonna go down, go down in flames. Burn these gym clothes!

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."