Working Part-time Gifts

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

"Since being semi-retired everything I do is half-assed."

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

'This new 'flexible working' scheme is a great idea. . . It helps us to identify staff who have a more balanced life. People who have interests outside of the office.'

"They'd sold out of #1's."

'Publisher recommends a good paper shredder.'

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"If I were writing fulltime, I'd have three unpublished novels by now."

Custom Cruiser Magazine Reader Survey: Do you own a lowrider?"

"They always give us minimum-wage, part-time guys the riskiest jobs."

I was considered a part time employee since I only worked one night a year and thus wasn't eligible for the pension plan, so here I am in my golden years.

"Ruddy gig economy."

"If you're part time here, what do you do the rest of the time?"

When applying for a part-time job in retail, try not to state the obvious.

"Actually, I'm just in town to waste eight hours a day, five days a week for thirty years, then I'm leaving. How about you?''

"This idea of offering staff flexible working options is genius, we should have done it years ago!"

'These part-time, no-benefits, temporary employees have the uncanny ability to disappear at will.'

"What's a good board for someone who gets out in the water once a year but talks about surfing incessantly?"

'I thought we agreed,one would do mornings and one the afternoons!'

Labour Force Survey Shows Increase in Part Time Working.

Part-time workers

'I only make $8 an hour, but fortunately, since they cut my hours, the job doesn't take up much of my time.'

"Yes, I've lost weight. I don't have time to eat because I have to work three jobs to buy food."

"You the fellow who ordered computer parts in bulk?"

Wally earns big buck stuffing envelopes at home!

"As a no-benefits, temporary, part time employee, we've given you the freedom to be your creative best!

Part-time workers.

"Juggling our schedules with me in school and you working full-time is just too difficult."

'Let's get one thing straight...I'm your employer, not your 'flexible friend'!'

"Just for a while dear, we must part."

I got a call from my agent so I have to step out for an audition. I'll be back before you are ready for dessert.