Part-time Worker Gifts

'I thought we agreed,one would do mornings and one the afternoons!'

"They always give us minimum-wage, part-time guys the riskiest jobs."

'This new 'flexible working' scheme is a great idea. . . It helps us to identify staff who have a more balanced life. People who have interests outside of the office.'

'I only make $8 an hour, but fortunately, since they cut my hours, the job doesn't take up much of my time.'

'Let's get one thing straight...I'm your employer, not your 'flexible friend'!'

Part-time workers

"Ruddy gig economy."

"Yes, I've lost weight. I don't have time to eat because I have to work three jobs to buy food."

"Since being semi-retired everything I do is half-assed."

'These part-time, no-benefits, temporary employees have the uncanny ability to disappear at will.'

When applying for a part-time job in retail, try not to state the obvious.

Part-time workers.

"Where are we going to find people willing to work old hours for a little extra money..."

"If you're part time here, what do you do the rest of the time?"

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

"I finally got that order off Benson last night. He signed it with a chopstick and soya sauce."

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

'We're looking for a 'temp' employee to serve time in Leavenworth.'

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

"I'll be right back. If you need anything, just holler."

"Sorry, Thompson. No temps on the corporate huddle."

"Must you bring your work to bed?"

Custom Cruiser Magazine Reader Survey: Do you own a lowrider?"

"Poor Chap,he's only been here a few days but the pressure of the job seems to have got to him already."

A Temporary One Day A Year Job Is Not Enough, I Want A Permanent Job!

'I'm the new chairman the temp agency sent over.'

'I can only offer you a temporary position. You can start on Monday... If we are still open.'

"I'm the temp."

"You can stop holding sir, everyone has gone home."

'We'd love to pay staff more, but there's just no money! But you've got dozens of empty posts, why can't you use the money saved to pay better rates?'