Work Ethic Philosopher Gifts

'I find it hard to believe that you work in energy development.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

Back to work...

"Yes, you have given 100% to this company. But, over the five years you've worked here that's only 20% a year."

"I can carry more pollen back to the hive that way..."

'I solve so many work problems at home.'

Peacock of Productivity

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

"Would you like to hear about our retirement plan?"

Body Language Expert - 'You don't like your job do you?'

"I can work for twelve straight hours without needing to be recharged."

"Do you have any working capital?"

"You say priorities, I hear suggestions."

"Oh come on, Dave! You know you're not supposed to come to work if you're sick."

A man on a desert island has an inbox and outbox both filled with sand.

"You want self-motivation? Look! I have my own carrot and stick!"

"He claims he does the work of two employees."

'Memo to the wife...'

"That painting's not going to paint itself."

"The boss won't be able to make it on time. He asked us to reschedule this meeting to discuss the agenda for our next meeting where we're going to brainstorm strategies to prevent procrastination in the workplace."

'As much time and effort as he puts into this job, you'd think there was some money in it.'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice, Lord Mayor of London.

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

Maybe you'd get more work done if you uninstalled that fish tank screensaver.'

"We've discovered the part of the human brain that activates achievement is located right next to the section that governs how much you look out the window."

Job Bored

'Get a half-life Mrs Curie.'

'Thank you for the job offer, sir, but I find that unemployment helps keep me humble.'

"There's such a thing as being TOO conscientious, Miller!"

"I was in the office an hour early this morning."

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