Work Ethic Debater Gifts

'You call it cheating, but you're always saying we should work smater, not harder.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

"Yes, you have given 100% to this company. But, over the five years you've worked here that's only 20% a year."

"In case something happens during the surgery and you become incapacitated, have you designated someone to make poor life choices on your behalf?"

'How do we SLEEP at night?'

"I can carry more pollen back to the hive that way..."

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

'If two wrongs don't make a right...try three.'

'I solve so many work problems at home.'

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

Peacock of Productivity

Jesus Christ, Health Insurance CEO

Plant Parenthood...

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

The continuing adventures of Rex, Washington DC insider.

'I recommend this to get rid of that stupid little voice whispering 'Don't forget to act ethical and responsible'!

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

Memory Content is King

"When we tested this medication on dogs, nobody noticed any side effects."

"I can work for twelve straight hours without needing to be recharged."

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

"Went in for a simple blood test and got cloned by mistake."

"At this point, we know it's addictive."

Man milks a book.

"...And since the cure is worse than the disease, we can make more money by developing a cure for that!"

'As we all know, the appearance of honesty is the best policy....'

'The idea of being cloned with a human being appals me..!'

Impeachment: the Moral High Ground Isn't as High as It Used to Be

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"Oh come on, Dave! You know you're not supposed to come to work if you're sick."