Wool Gatherer T-Shirts

Army Leader: 'We have ways of making Ewe talk.'

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

"That's Arnie, our resident meeting moth. He doesn't have an office... Just flits all day from one meeting to another. And be careful: he's got a thing for wool!"

Dick's hobby of collecting manhole covers kept him out of trouble... except of the hernias.

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

'I so wish we had found the shears in the shipwreck...'

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

"Oh, its just a fun fur that my husband got me."

"I'm trying to make them look less scary."

Genetic Manipulation

"Keep your guard up. We're entering big-cat country."

I try to stick to hunting. My wife makes me take a list when I'm gathering.

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

We're having a dinner party.

'His social skills have improved since he lost his job in banking.'

"My parents hate it."

"Wow, you're right, Alpaca Wool is very nice against the skin..."

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

"I knew it was just a matter of time before the sheep hit the fan."

"Your father helped me, too."

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."

Wool jumpers: Meet the author

"Let's be realistic. Are we all going to try to keep this party afloat, or should we just go home and forget it?"

Will work for grass

"Does the fool not realise who I am...?? I am GORDO - Destroyer of Worlds and I shall rip his soul apart...Hmmm...actually, that ball of wool looks like it needs punishing..."

'The wool is virgin - it's none of your damn business about the sheep!'

'Sure, but I'm the one who has to SKIN it!'

The Red Cat: Home is where the hearth is/Fancy Dress/Dances with wools.

Ghak was a hunter, Zhoomba was a gatherer and Fnok was a sponger.

" know a bargain when I see one!"