Woodpecker Fans Gifts

I think we waited too long to tell him he's adopted.

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"Toi Toi Toi!"

'Why did the chicken cross the road?'

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

'Ouch! I'm glad I didn't lay him.'

Rower Bobby Pearce stops mid-race to let some ducks cross his path safely

Turkey Farm Inc: 'And guess what you get for a Christmas bonus?'

If chickens had lips...'Thank God! I made it to the other side!'

"I haven't been fond of humans since one of them coined the phrase, 'in the soup'."

'Bravo Professor, you stumbled upon the one fact that makes sense of it all. Unfortunately humanity is not permitted to know that the Universe was designed by a committee of ducks.'

'Looks like a mixed school of Bottlenose dolphins and bottled endorphins.'

"You must be brave now, Randolph! You. . . You. . . You are adopted!"

' 'cock-a-doodle-doo' out of whack!'

'Culled?! That's a relief...I thought you said we were gonna be killed!'

"I swar if you say it's what's inside that counts I will murder you will my beak."

Thanksgiving Turkey Weight and Fortune

Don't fly and text.

Frankly, I wish our intelligence was compared to another species.

The Ultimate Beginner's Board

In later years, the grim spectre continued to haunt Linus.

"Hazmat's been very good to me. But my first real love is still beekeeping."

The Early Bird

Nashville Peacock

"Hypoglycemia? Well, maybe. But like that pain in your shoulder, it could be a lot of things."

Skinny Santa Claus munches on carrot, as obese Rudolph eats mince pie.

Rudy, Must you keep singing that song...' children in the morning...children in the evening...children at suppertime?

'I think the eight reindeer just look tiny by COMPARISON.'

"Omelettes again?!"

Naughty little boy a 'cochin' it for throwing stones at the fowls.

Only one Partridge in a pear tree? Mr. Jones next door gave his true love two partridges.

"Why did the farmer cross the road?"

"Hi - I'm on my dolphone."

"Well son - they're orthoducks."

'C'mon in Rudolph, these ain't no reindeer games.'