Wood Chewer T-Shirts

"I love November - the crunch of leaves underfoot... the crisp air... the holiday markets..." "... it getting dark by mid-afternoon..." "Okay, that's less enjoyable."

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

There's a lot of crying out there! Looks like we were gnawing on the internet cable...

"If a tree falls in the forest and hits a certain individual, would he still be able to testify?"

'How much did you say we'd be saving by buying a wood-burning stove?'

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

'Arnold, blow the whole depot, then hightail it out of here.'

"Any beaver can cut down trees, but marquetry, now that's art."

"Let me guess, you fell asleep chewing bubble gum again..."

"January 11. Still struggling with the novel. Chopped more firewood."

Loggerheads

The Lumberjack and the Yule Log

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

'I just don't understand what the big deal is about kiln dried lumber.'

Pinochio's Computer

Sawrd Fighting

Philosophy of Forestry: 'How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Walt? Roger? Steve? Anyone?'

'Well, if you don't smoke or drink, stop chewing gum!'

"I always wondered why they called you detectives, 'gum shoes'."

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

Man cutting a tree using a axe connected to a machine

Bicycle Pie Chart

Floorist: 'Say it with Timber'

Take your Daughter to Word Day

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

'The lumber company may not sell anything for new construction, but it sure is cleaning up on selling wood for boarding up houses.'

Due to rising fuel prices and tired of dodging kickback, Fred tries an alternative method of cutting firewood.

Practical Woodworm...

Man talking to a tree.

Paranoid Woodcutter Suspicious of Trees

Tree thinks about its lifecycle as a man is about to cut it down.

"Of course trees can walk. We're just lazy."