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St. Lukes Church: Pray and Display

"Adopted? It's cute how you think we would've picked you."

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

'Oh, and one more thing

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

"Yes, it was 'love at first sight'. But, by the time I'd made my first opticians appointment we were already married."

'Without thinking Captain Hook uses the wrong hand'

'Can we just do this pass-fail?'

Knights of the iPhone

"When life gives me lemons, I know twenty-six ways to kill a man with a lemon."

"Yes I do like intelligent women - what a stupid question!"

"My husband would get out and change the tire, but he has a lug nut allergy."

Picasso's brew period.

"It's nice to know I've still got it."

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

"You have to admire their ingenuity at least -- They're burying their apple cores."

'Some boys think I'm pretty. Some think I'm ugly. What do you think?'

'Maybe I've got washboard abs underneath - you ever think that?'

Slow food.

'I'll trade you my topsoil for your apple.'

'I'd sooner be dead than be buried here...'

Liquor Store: Lean to Open.

"You've put on weight."

"The entire time you were talking to Marissa you had a piece of spinach between your teeth."

Inattentive Boy

A Women Out For A Walk With Her Children.

"You can try all you want, but being smooth is just something you're born with."

'Did you order the new sign?'