Winning Awards Gifts

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

Award Winning Gardener

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

"I'm telling you, she's the best in her field."

Win - win

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

Gymnasts falling off the winners pedestal.

'She deserves it since she's raised our three kids with me overseas.'

First Prize!

'Nine national treasures in one film! Start writing your Oscar speech, darling.'

"So that's where you were last night."

"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."

Soccer coach of the year.

"Eureka! Details to follow."

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

"This year the endowed chair will go to whomever pulls the sword from the stone."

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I simply can't believe that I've won this award. I keep wanting to pinch myself."

"Oh my goodness. My lecture on John Donne has just been awarded Most Pizzazzy Metaphysical Lecture of the Year."

And this one i got for properly polishing my medals.

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

Zdeno Chara

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

Shy goalie smiles under umbrella in victory downfall of streamers

"...and I'd like to thank all my patients for being so ill..."