Wine Maverick T-Shirts

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

The Vineyard

'A cheeky red?'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Yoga for Alcoholics

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Sauvignon Bonk

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Bacchus.

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

'Man...You age great!'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"I think it stopped breathing."

"He gets easily abstracted."

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'