Wine And Spirits Gifts

"Is the vodka fresh?"

"Are you looking for 'drinks and nibbles' beer, 'I don't really drink beer' beer, or good old fashioned 'gidday mate' beer?"

Inappropriate garnish.

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

In the Guru District

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'A cheeky red?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Bacchus.

Sauvignon Bonk

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'... And this is my cellar.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."