Will Reading Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'Hold up everyone. I read that last part wrong. She wants you to divide the 'cash' equally.'

"Meet The Author"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Thomas Mann.

Victor Hugo

First Novels.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

The Dorrie Decimal System

Voltaire

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Blue Stockings

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

'He likes to power nap.'

Television Readers.

"Now I really hate poetry."

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

John Bunyan

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

Silence of the Chickens...

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Characters jumping out of a book.

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

Don Quixote

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "