Wildlife Humor Collector Pillows

Occasionally the birdtable would be visited by a family of Chavfinches.

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Too much concealer?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'Pray for me.'

Giraffe Portrait

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

Crow and fox

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

The different taste regions on a blue whale's tongue.

"Don't worry, it's not rabies: It's normal for me to foam at the mouth..."

'I didn't have time to hunt'

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

The cat's pyjamas - cat camouflage.

The polar bear's vending machine.

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

"Fasten your seat belt."

'This will teach them to clean up after themselves after they camp in our woods!'

'I don't see how you can breathe through that thing - it's so small!'

'She hunts, she brings it back, and my manhood,thank goodness, remains intact.'

"Mating display of the white-bellied boobie"

'It feels like two hours of my life is missing.'

"Hang on a minute! This is not for us: he's bought himself a pet rat!"