Wilderness Adventures Gifts

Jungle Traffic Cones

Bitchbark Canoe

'Not that net!'

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Local Knowledge

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

"My family has been fishing these waters for nearly 40 years. . ."

"Alright! Whoa! Yes! More boiled food!"

Sausages.

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

'Echo Tourism'

"As near as I can figure, we're in the Unpainted Desert!"

"He's got no idea how to run a Husky team."

"All right, boys, we're had our fun."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

"Move ten paces, turn, then fire. Ready?" "Dibs on the hat."

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

Snowmobull

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

Collies Without Borders

Then get under cover before you are struck by lightning.

"As some of you may have guessed I got yesterday's sunburn factor wrong!"

'Mom! This high resolution screen makes it seem like you're really outdoors!'