Wild Wanderer Gifts

'He's never been much of a homebody.'

'I just didn't like humans all that much, so, a few years ago, I decided to go feral...'

Themeless Park - 1 Mile

"I'm a wild horse and want to remain that way, but shoes would sure help my aching feet..."

'Obedience school was just not for me: I ran away...'

"Ahhh... close enough."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'Not that net!'

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'We look for a new drug, we find a virus - we look for a new virus, we find a drug...'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Support Group for a Good Problem

'Now that's an afro!'

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

Sausages.

Sparkling Water

A tourist inadvertently destroying the place he is visiting

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

"Where the wild things were."

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

The only way to see the world is to see the world

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."