
Wordplay: Lemonade - Save the Lemon.
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Wordplay: Lemonade - Save the Lemon.
Debug
"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "
"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"
'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'
Copycats
"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"
Zombie standup
Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker
Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'
Today we'll see some misused or misunderstood financial and economic terms. It's said inflation can hurt the economy. But it's absolutely in the tire business. I bought this warm puffy jacket with cash. A down payment. We like beer and coffee. Our most valuable liquid assets. In a monopoly breakup, the race car would to go one person and the dog to another. And when I become either a buyer or a seller. He's shorting the market!
"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"
"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"
"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."
"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"
I will study my speling words...
'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'
"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."
"You're going to hate yourself."
"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."
Smart Ass - Wise Ass
"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."
"I don't want to fork. I just want to spoon."
"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"
'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'
It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.
QUINTUPLE BYPASSES EXPLAINED.
Backfire
This Message Has No Content
1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted
Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.
"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."
Assault 'n' Vinegar
'Do you have any catsup?'
"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."
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