Whimsical Letter Writer Pillows

'What? -- You didn't get your letter to Santa notarized?'

'Dear Great Pumpkin...'

Santa Claus's Mail

The Apostle Paul receives a reply from the Corinthians.

Deep in the heart of the RAND think tank, the world's greatest scientists would gather to brainstorm Batman's fight sounds.

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

Bubble gum leaves

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Before texting we had to write letters by hand, and before emojis we honestly just bottled up our emotions."

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

'They call me Portugese Man of War, but I'm really just a jellyfish of love.'

I don't want a story that helps kids make sense of the world – I want a world that lets kids just enjoy a nonsense story.

Mother Goose's Haiku

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

A Poet

Dear folks. Well, you were right; being the prettiest gator of the Everglades hasn't helped me one bit.'

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

'He has his father's feet.'

"I think that I shall never see a lawsuit lovely as a tree." "Don't go soft on us, Lenny."

"It's not a real company, it's a shell company."

"I had no idea. You mean I'm a dog?"

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am 62 years old and was fired from my job of 22 years just before xmas 2010. What should I do? Sincerely, Irene. Attack! Stop! Enough, Sadie. Haven't you been listening? The mean-spirited, virulent partisanship of talk show hosts must end. People were hurt and some died. Aren't you the ultimate partisan, you coot? That's different lady! Fasten your seatbelts.

"I'll have the 'All you can eat from the menu, the kitchen, and the dumpster' special."

'Remember that Op-Ed piece you wrote last month?...'

Kathleen felt she was stuck between Iraq and a heart place.

"Take a letter, any letter"

"Today no one, and I mean no one, could get the sneakers out of my mouth..."

"I'm writing to mother to let her know how you're doing.Is deathbed one word or two?"

"I don't know the letter carrier's name, but I can't help thinking of him as 'Bill'."

James Russell Lowell

That night, Neil Thomas declared himself the poet laureate of 1973 Sheffield Lane.