Whig Fan Gifts

Sir Robert Walpole

'General, please hire large armies of foreign mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation and tyranny.'

"Rescue...we've come to join you."

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

"Sire, they also want dental."

'It's the consistently defininative obscure obviation coupled with absolute commitment to incomprehensible policy objectives that I find appealing.

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

Middlesex Election, 1804- Burdett and his Radical Allies Anticipate Victory

Of Course, we can't expect things to be as good as they have been up to now

National Liberty and Tax Codes.

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

'If social security were privatized, the administration also suggested a name change to 'Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld holdings inc.''

Just Figureheads.

News remote

'There'll be a small tax hike -- I need to build a warehouse to store the budget surplus.'

Supremacist Court

US recommendation for Middle East peacemaking.

'I'm working through the Summer as usual: I take my annual leave in Winter you see...'

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."

Victory speech.

"This is the most transparent administration in history..."

"There are some things medical science cannot explain...like where the hell our health care system is heading."

"Now, should we add something at the end about how wise we are and therefore nothing in here should ever be changed?"

GOP Controlled State Legislatures!

'And if you want to investigate alternative courses of treatment, you're entitled to consult your pollster.'

"Be sure to say tuned for our upcoming special report: 'Please, God, let this all be a bad dream'."

Red Ink

"Anybody know how to spell anarchy?"

"We were thinking, since your head speechwriter understands the issues better than you do, speaks better than you do, is smarter and better-looking than you.."