Western Comedy Fan Gifts

Roy couldn't understand why no-one would use his services.

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

Nun Fight.

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

'And what makes you think this is hostile terrain, Hank?'

'Mama! Aliens.'

(Maps to the Homes of the Steers) (Maps $ 100)

Brewery Lorry has Saloon Doors.

Cattlemans Saloon.

'If we survive this, you are totally walking home.'

'When I said loosen your buckle and let 'em drop, I was talking about your gunbelt.'

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

Jesse wished the kids would just get it over with and guess all the wrong letters in his name.

"Giddyup."

"Is it just me or are wagon wheels smaller than they used to be?"

'They say he came to clean up the town.'

In and Out Boxes: Good, Bad, and Ugly.

Early abductions.

"Deputy, round up a posse, I can't find my phone."

"The kid meant nothin' by it Zeke... a lot of young 'uns put a fancy love-heart pattern on a caffe latte."

Uh-oh!

'He was wearing his heart on his sleeve.'

I'm Ok, You're Ok Corral

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

Wanted for Stick Up

"Hey, I'm sure glad we re-opened the downtown mall with this new road."

Bunfight at the O.K. Corral

"You're wearing it backwards."

'I wouldn't do that if I were you, mister. This saloon is made entirely of ninjas.'