Wellness Whisperer Gifts

"Basically, the job is hands on training."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

'Well, well, well...'

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

Be Healthy

"Your contents have shifted."

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

Critisize your weight.

Unguided imagery

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

You can breed these if the environment is right.

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

Shrinks in heaven

'Need I tell you the name of the game?'

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

Burnout Syndrome...

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

"I'm allergic to money. But luckily they've got antihistamines for that."

'I'll need more than I can spend.'