Wellness Enthusiast Pillows

'Undermined and under-appreciated, constantly chasing ever-changing unreasonable targets, depressed and overstressed...still enough about me. What can I do for you?'

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

"Good for you for getting your mammogram."

'What kind of quack is he? No pills, no special diets! He just believes in will power!'

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

"Jim! Long time. Are you still making your own granola?"

Work and Life Balance

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

'You're just like everybody else these days - disgustingly healthy!'

Olive Oil Medicine

"Holy moly!"

"Congratulations! You are a seminal figure of wellness."

Family doctor.

Health and Spirit.

"It's all down to turmeric!"

". . . and . . . of course, worrying about those things will kill you!"

'The doctor won't see you unless you can confirm that you haven't had an apple a day...'

"I'm a shadow of my former self."

"I think of my body as a temple.:, "You need a more orthodox diet."

"It's simple. Remove everything from your life that you enjoy, so you can live a long, unenjoyable life."

"I know! - I'm just the same!"

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

"Well, so much for antioxidants."

"The amethyst has calming properties – which is great when you’re out of Xanax."

"The seventh-inning triangle pose..."

"I'm not so much interested in 'wellness' as I am 'swellness'."

CBD Oil for Neurotics

"Are they organic?"

Reducing Salon Doors

"But you just had an annual checkup two weeks ago"

'The early chiropractor.'

Advice Desk: 'Yes, stand up straight, you're slouching.'

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

Grandma the Witch