Wedding Planner's Delight Gifts

'And do you, Irene, promise to give it your best shot?'

'You should have ordered - this is the last cake in the shop...'

Divorce Lawyer on the Wedding Cake

'I still say it was a mistake having the ceremony TOO close to his stag night!'

'I will subject to certain conditions...'

The Happiest Hen in Acle

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

Save the Date

Lesbian civil partnership.

"You may now kiss the bride..."

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

Boat wedding.

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

'I always cry at weddings!'

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

'He does.'

"Will you listen to the same three anecdotes until one of you dies?"

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

"...until death do you a favor."

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'