Wedding Fanatic Gifts

'Thank you for not consumating'

Royal Wedding History

"It isn't always all about you, Cindy."

'Unfortunately he's not very popular! Right now he's placing an ad in the paper for a best man!'

'Can I have the bloody bride and groom please?'

"This will all end in tiers."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

'I always cry at weddings!'

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

'Amount of white out used while writing, Moby Dick, an issue of The National Enquirer, and 101 Uses for a Dead Cat.'

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

Wedding disaster #27.

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

Science fiction fans on other planets

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

Visual Gag: An about to be married Bride using a real train as a wedding gown train

'The correct response, Tanya, is 'I do' not 'yeah, whatever'.'

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

"The Chinese Zodiac told me to marry a sheep. Who am I to question hundreds of years of ancient Chinese wisdom?"