Web Domain Enthusiast Gifts

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Likes: $2.

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

Man doing a search on a computer

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

INTERNET MARRIAGE.

'Do you have 4G up here?'

"The Internet ate my baby!"

"Does the ark have wifi?"

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

'How do I get people to visit my...'

I e-bay t-shirt.

And so, Rudy unwittingly became an investor in The Infant Restaurant Critic. At first, he was furious having lost his weekly paycheck. But then it dawned on him: He was back in the dot-com game – for the first time in 20 years. He was practically a venture capitalist! I'm a social media investor. It's a multi-platform play with, obviously, huge mobile capability, global reach, soaring audience share. Revenue model? What? Huh? Beat it.

Tom Cruise

Naming that Impala

"Home is where the WiFi is."

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

'Another big newspaper just went out of business.', 'How did you hear about that?', 'I read it on the internet.'

Information Macht Frei

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

"'Can correctly complete a CAPTCHA image 8 our of 10 times.' Any other skills?"

Scientist researching animal droppings is looking at Faeces Book on the computer.

What really became of the boy named Sue.

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

"I wish you people would just read the blog."