Weapons Developer Gifts

'Come back you fool! Separately we're nothing - but together we can conquer the world.'

'Change - yes, but is now really the moment to be discussing change?'

'What do you mean it doesn't work? It's not rocket science!'

'I don't like the look of their new weapon!'

"Why didn't I think of that?"

'All I'm saying is that if we don't want to be invaded, we'd be better off with weapons of mass destruction.'

'I just got a text from HQ. Whatever it is we do, it ain't rocket science.'

"I work for a defense company designing monstrous ways to kill people, but one afternoon a year, I volunteer at a soup kitchen to balance the scales."

The Jumping Tank

"The bomb destroys only all life but not object! This means that our troops can have fun plundering and pillaging. War doesn't have to be inhuman, right?"

Smart Weapon

"Can Interest you in something new?"

'The future is in drones and cyber attacks. . .'

Implications of the quantum wavefunction 12: 'You can never be complete safe.' Until it actually hits something a fired projectile could materialize anywhere.

'I know it doesn't look like much, but have you ever been shot in the face with a p****d off cat?'

"Is there actually someone who is not involved in Syria?"

"All we want is something new that will incapacitate the enemy without giving us a bad press."

Contraband! Disguising Shells for Shipment in Neutral Bottoms.

The Computer Bore

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

Back to work...

Friday

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

"But I use all of them!"

'The boss said to get rid of all the pirated software before he returns, which will be in about five to ten years.'

Engineer on the move.

Progress?

"I'm afraid you neglected to submit the proper development permit application."

Weapons of War Through the Ages.

The Appearance of the Gatling Machine-Gun in 1864 caught the world by surprise.

"Gnork invented the wheel, Shnorz invented the hand axe, and my genius paints lines and circles. . . what do you want to do with it? Maybe building something where you can look at cat pictures? Hahaha!"

A dog whose nose is a gun.

"Real estate values soar, cute boutiques proliferate, fine cuisine abounds. These are exciting times to live in Hoboken."