Weaponized Fashionista Gifts

"It's a smaller, less destructive nuclear weapon, but it's also a hat."

"Wow, you look sexy today."

'It makes a cutting edge fashion statement, plus it has room for a gas mask and compact bio hazard suit.'

"So we`re going out and you haven`t even bothered to change?"

"A duck call won't grab the attention of a modern duck. You need to draw them in with Snapchat."

"We're thinking of having your nose pierced."

It's from your private medical insurance.

Grenadiers

This Spring's Girl will be a warrior type, a survivor.

'I don't suppose it occured to you to simply agree to disagree?'

' Wow ! You look dressed to kill ! '

'Do red sweaters have that carcinogenic red dye #2 in them?'

'How funny, you've got a pimple on your nose.'

'How's Mr. lazy bones today?'

'This is Hell, madam. Everything you try on will make your butt look big.'

'Burberry cushioning, very nice.'

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'

The Writer

"I thought we agreed - no turtlenecks after spring."

"You're right, that new girl has a great personality, terrific hair, and dynamite figure, so we agree....we hate her, right?"

Ape.

The grim reaper tries on new clothes

Fears

"I am going to prune the climbing rose."

'Is it tank top season already, General?'

'It appears he caught his tie. Let's mark this one down as a victim of fashion.'

"Maybe you're overdoing the scarf thing."

'Anything to take those shoes off.'

British Grenadier

Prince Albert Attempts to Design New Uniforms for the Army

GPs to be required to deal with 'lifestyle' issues. I can advise you on smoking, exercise and obesity issues,but whether that T-shirt makes you look 'buff' is outside of my remit.

'I told you that stilettos were dangerous!'

"I'll be with you in a minute. I have to stretch out my skinny jeans before I can fit into them."

"You're not going out wearing that tie with that shirt are you?"

The Rebrand