Weaponized Fashionista Gifts

"It's a smaller, less destructive nuclear weapon, but it's also a hat."

"Wow, you look sexy today."

'It makes a cutting edge fashion statement, plus it has room for a gas mask and compact bio hazard suit.'

"So we`re going out and you haven`t even bothered to change?"

"A duck call won't grab the attention of a modern duck. You need to draw them in with Snapchat."

"We're thinking of having your nose pierced."

It's from your private medical insurance.

This Spring's Girl will be a warrior type, a survivor.

Grenadiers

'I don't suppose it occured to you to simply agree to disagree?'

' Wow ! You look dressed to kill ! '

'Do red sweaters have that carcinogenic red dye #2 in them?'

'How's Mr. lazy bones today?'

'How funny, you've got a pimple on your nose.'

'Burberry cushioning, very nice.'

'This is Hell, madam. Everything you try on will make your butt look big.'

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'

"I thought we agreed - no turtlenecks after spring."

Fears

The Writer

"I am going to prune the climbing rose."

Ape.

'Is it tank top season already, General?'

The grim reaper tries on new clothes

"You're right, that new girl has a great personality, terrific hair, and dynamite figure, so we agree....we hate her, right?"

'It appears he caught his tie. Let's mark this one down as a victim of fashion.'

"Maybe you're overdoing the scarf thing."

British Grenadier

Prince Albert Attempts to Design New Uniforms for the Army

'I told you that stilettos were dangerous!'

GPs to be required to deal with 'lifestyle' issues. I can advise you on smoking, exercise and obesity issues,but whether that T-shirt makes you look 'buff' is outside of my remit.

'Anything to take those shoes off.'

"You're not going out wearing that tie with that shirt are you?"