Wealthy Mourner Gifts

"With the Coffin 3000, you can take it with you."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"And we will absolutely start lending again as soon as we finish building our debtors' prison."

'It's crunch time, Caldwell. That's the time between when you're born, and when you make your first million.'

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

Greed.

The Personal ATM

'Wake up! You should be worrying about our investments!'

Counting my Bonus...

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

"We've got to fix the climate before we run out of trees to print money on."

'Se Non E Vero' Etc.

'If you want to be a great success, get yourself huge wads of money.'

'There's a no-nonsense quality about TJ that I admire.'

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

You Know You're Old When...

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."

Save the earth/Make Money.

'We're not clear who is running your company.'

Bernard Madoff's House Arrest.

'Oh well, if greed wasn't so good, we've still got lust, gluttony, sloth, wrath, envy and pride.'

"Rest assured we invest your money as if it were our own. Can I borrow 50 bucks?"

Red Letter Days - Payment of Dividends

"The filthy rich"

"Let's not forget one thing—theirs is California money."

Financial Consultants: Gambling with other peoples money since 1987.

"Philip! Nice to see you still at large."

"We've got borrower's remorse."

'I started out in creative writing, began dabbling a bit in creative finance and accounting, and before I knew it, wound up here!'

Safe under mattress.

'Remember, it's not a lie if it makes us money.'

Lady to tombstone: 'Sam, I invested all of your money in an IPO last week ... we're millionaires!'

'Need I tell you the name of the game?'