Modern Mourner Gifts

"Come on, love. All this fuss just because your mobile phone died."

Free speech isn't cheap!

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

Life after death

"I guess laughter wasn’t the best medicine."

'Se Non E Vero' Etc.

"Your husband says BOO!"

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Ventriloquist Grave

'Life is a precious thing, but simply breathing and existing isn't living...the end is inevitable for everything...I'm afraid that time has come for you, dear. I have to pull the plug...'

Next Sunday - Rap Mass! 'I thought we reached the limit when we had that jazz mass.'

You Know You're Old When...

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."

TV and man

Pastor wearing sunglasses against the hymns.

Widow shows a portrait of herself

Modern Charm

Pickles the Clown: Son of Bonzo and Gwen. A Pro to the End.

"Would it kill you to help around the house for once?!"

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

'He was only ninety three.'

"This ham bone did not have much meat on it by the time I met it, but it tasted of meat, and for that I am eternally grateful."

"He hasn't been the same since his phone died."

"When I moved here after your mother passed... The first thing I did was make this altar...so I could pray for her. But your father said, 'Just no photos.'"

'It freaks me out that you're keeping your dead mum preserved in Formalin on the mantelpiece!'

A Conservation Biologist Goes for Therapy

A grave with an array of beauty products

"Is it me, or does the old man still look angry at us for denting his Cadillac?"

Church Sign Asks If You Are Prepared for Digital Conversion.

"I was able to get in one last lecture about diet and exercise."

'I feel ridiculous!'

Former Survivalist

Dead Workaholic