Wealth Worriers Pillows

'And after extensive research, we found conclusive evidence that money does indeed make you happy!'

Great Chinese Dynasties

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

"It's called American acceptionalism. We grab more and more of the country's wealth and 99% of Americans just continue to accept it."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"I have a huge house, millions in the bank, and a twenty year old wife. But am I happy?..."

"Okay... how about some people are poverty rich but asset poor?"

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

"Here's what you wanted – a strategy to live abundantly, build capital, surpass your peers and disappoint your heirs."

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

It is my mother's, she uses it as an anchor for our yacht.

Money god

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

Golden bubbles

I think I have a gilt complex.

"I've accepted that I'm getting richer."

Trickledown economics

'If I lived there, the first thing I'd do is have my head examined.'

"Stocks rose today on news that even higher taxes won't stop the rich from getting richer."

"All those years of dodging taxes and chasing investment yield have kept me in top shape, right?"

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'And, lastly, I'd like to thank Chuck for his years of service. He'll be leaving the company next month to spend more time with his cash and cash equivalents.'

Investor alternates between hating and loving gold, depending on the stock market's performance.