Wealth Guru Gifts

'Okay...how about some people are poverty rich but asset poor?'

'Alice, call the emergency doctor! I just thought 'Hey, I've made enough money!''

"We must be rich... because we're getting richer."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Jack of all trades

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

The president's men

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

The MBA Draft

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

The best financial decision I ever made.

The economy.