Water Jesters Pillows

"You're not going to eat me are you? Have you never heard of mad worm disease?"

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

"Now that we're into spring, we want to warn you that spring fever can be contagious..."

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

"Any other skills?"

'I take it his performance review went well.'

Rodins rotten juggler

'Congratulations, you're now man and wife. You may club the bride. '

"Let's see how brave you are without your gun."

'It must be a milkfish.'

Pumping up wig in blender.

'Sorry, kids, I forgot we live in Michigan.'

'We must be nearing land. It's a discount coupon from the island's mall.'

Todays Special: Vented Spleen.

'I'd like to teach the world to sting.'

Castaway can't remembers how to write S.O.S.

"It's creepy the way they play with their food."

Coast to coast walk.

"Every Christmas you make a lot of primises you never keep, why don't you become a politian."

'They made him take a vow of silence so he'd have to stop complaining about his oath of poverty.'

Man flashing at a periscope in the middle of the ocean

'What with Obama and all his giveaways, I'm surprised you're still in business.'

"They're fake, when I get to school I'm telling everyone that I have evolved."

"Run for your lives! The sea level is rising at the rate of about 1 foot per century!"

'That's intellectually dishonest, Sid.'

"Your 'Low On Ink' light is lit."

'Sorry, pal - I don't really go for ginger blokes.'

"Paul is a saint, Minneapolis, no way!!"

Can we use the buddy system and just keep five commandments each?

'I told you we should have read the fine print when the accountant said we'd be getting 10,000 bucks a month in our retirement.'

Sue was desperate to get married. But not that desperate.

"Oh yeah, well I say you're black!"

Who's the wise guy!