Watching Trials Gifts

'That Conrad Murray Trial almost makes me glad I can't afford health insurance.'

'It's stress related. Stop watching the Jodi Arias and George Zimmerman trials.'

Trial by Media

I love Lawyers

"Bailiff."

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"You can't plead cute."

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

"Mr. McMurdo has been called 'guilty as the day is long.' And yet, do not biblical scholars tell us a day can mean many things?"

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

'No, you weren't there. But in your expert opinion as a certified brainiac, do you think he did it?'

'He started it!'

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

'Oh, objection, objection, objection - what is it this time, Counselor?'

"Let me tell you, folks—I've been around long enough to develop an instinct for these things, and my client is innocent or I'm very much mistaken."

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

"Excellent! It's the disclosure documents for your hearing on Monday."

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

"This jury may not be swayed by any defense that relies on emotion."

Counsel's Opinion.

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

Two lawyers in a royal court

'Is your verdict unanimous?'