Watching People Gifts

"Our neighbors are much more entertaining than what's on cable TV. And it's free!"

"Apparently, in this kingdom, there's no room for a 'royal watcher'."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

"They grow up so fast."

The Zoo.

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Tourists

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

Cariactures

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

"Now I really hate poetry."

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Television Readers.

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

Lazy Octopus

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

"I AM at my usual position."

'There's nothing on.'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

The Dance of the Penguins Once the March Is Over

"I think we may be related!"