Watching Children's Tv Pillows

"No now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

"Forget the harps, we can spend Eternity in there."

"The couch hates me Jane!"

'I caught him watching tv, surfing the net, and playing video games ..book him!'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

'Hold on, Bob. I'm downshifting.'

'It's not as impressive as it looks. He only watches fishing shows.'

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

"Nostalgia is one helluva drug."

"Yes, Madame, Teletubbies."

A Truism's Journey

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

'I expect 'Sesame Street has seen some new developments since I was your age?'

"Miss Rogers, Sally Green. Is it true my son's research project is 'the effect of too much television on a typical ten-year-old?'"

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

Campaign 2016

Child thinking pregnant mother looks like a Telly-Tubby.

'Helen! I'm all settled in and I don't want to get up. Would you get the remote for me?'

'They had to increase security. He's being stalked by a deranged paleontologist.'

'Darling, wake up, I've just realised ... we're not HD ready.'

Pastor of Muppets

"That's it! You've watched TV out here long enough! We need to spend more family time together! I'm putting this thing in the closet!"

'Don't take it personally... he doesn't know I'm here either.'

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

"I know, I know... But I thought he would bring down the price of eggs."

"Today's weather forecast, is very accurate."

'To me a re-run is only something I've already seen this morning.'

Women bring a different perspective to watching football.

"I like everything Big Bird's ever done."

Celebrity 10 o'clock news...

'A ground ball to deep short, handled beautifully by Santana...'